Before I receive rejections, and few rocks into my head, I want to claim something. I didn’t even start writing, and I’m already justifying (hehe), but it’s because of the beliefs of the majority of people that I’m surrounded with. When someone mentions a word psychotherapist, the crowd goes wild in “I’m not crazy” style. Which is, unsubtle followed by the exclamations such as “I don’t need someone to solve my problems”.
First thing, I’ll shorten this description as much as I can, psychotherapists are dealing with completely healthy people, and psychotherapies are used to enhance the possibility to solve our life problems in adult and responsible way.
Second thing, I totally agree when people say “I don’t need someone to solve my problems”! Let me kiss them on the cheeks! :* If you don’t find my sharing boring, you’ll find the reasons to these beliefs in the next exciting post of mine, which will be written soon! Till then, feel free to hate me. 😉 I’ll link it here, at least. 😀
So, being a healthy person, and not needing anybody to solve your problems or current unpleasant situations, why would you even go to a psychotherapist or a mentor?
There are some situations that are hard to handle and we want to solve them. In many cases, our process to a solution becomes a process of finding ways how to hide “garbage” and forget about it or put the “garbage” into other’s yard. And when a similar situation appears, all the “garbage” spreads around and we ask ourselves how the hell did we get into the same crap again. We tend to follow our old familiar patterns, and try to sort things in our way although that philosophy is rarely, and even unhealthy, effective onto the outer world.
I mentioned responsibility in the description of what the psychotherapists do. Subjectively looking at inner dissatisfaction, and relations with others, it’s easy to fall into a trap what is “right” or “wrong”, and hard to see what are our boundaries and what are the boundaries of others. Many times, is hard to notice how much we are personally responsible for something, and how childish we behave when we don’t feel contented.
Dealing with a psychotherapist for more than a year, and with another one for the last few months, I can say that I learned and discovered a lot, much faster than expected. I discovered a lot about my boundaries and boundaries of others, which grew more respect towards myself and the others. It’s much easier to understand where are the problems coming from, to put myself into other’s shoes, accept dissimilarities, where the power lies, and what does it mean to grow up and take responsibility.
These things that I wrote are not here to convince anybody to go to therapies. This is a sharing from an old scared and skeptical person, I’m talking about me (thank you, Captain Obvious!), who wants to spread her observations and conclusions.
And one more thing, before you continue to enjoy your life, it takes more guts to open yourself and face your “garbage” with someone, then playing all cool “I can handle everything on my own”.